I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
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