This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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