I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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