As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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