Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
