at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Randomize
