2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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