he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
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