No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
