Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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