; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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