i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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