Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
