apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
