do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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