You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Sorry about my life...
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
