DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
