Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
We just shotgunned beers for America
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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