I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
