Christians are straight up FREAKS
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
