Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Randomize