i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
