he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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