Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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