If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
is that a dick in a sweater?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize