this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize