I am puke
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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