I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize