You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize