How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Randomize
