What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize