Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
