We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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