I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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