Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
