They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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