Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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