therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
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