i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Randomize