He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
So vagazzling was a success
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
