I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Rumble strips road head = magical
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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