even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
