he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
