BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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