She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
