You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
