he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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