absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize
