We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
So. Much. Porn.
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