I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
